As of this entry, my son has kept his underwear clean and dry for the fourth day in a row! Mind, these are normal, cotton undies -- not the disposable ones. Earlier attempts to use regular underwear have come to (very) bad ends...and messy ones, at that. At this point, however, we simply can not buy him any more and are doing a lot of finger-crossing and praying.
A made it through Thursday evening at church, through school all day on Friday, and was away from home on Saturday about half the day and home the rest. All dry and clean. He made it through church this morning, and lunch, and it's now mid-afternoon. He has also slept in them overnight, and had no issues. Woo hoo!! I am so unbelievably proud of my kiddo. (I realize that if you're new to this site, you may think that this is not much of a big deal. I assure you, it is to us).
I'm really hoping the diaper bag days are (finally) at a close, albeit about 4 years later than most parents get to do it. The average age for autistic children to be potty trained is actually 5, so we're not doing too badly. A is six and a half.
It's been a rough go up to this point. There were tears on both our parts at various stages in the game, his because we were altering his routine and he simply did NOT want to do it, mine because I was so, so very frustrated to be cleaning the poopy butt of a stubborn 6-yr old kid that ran past the bathroom to go hide in a corner and poop in his pants.
Poop gets much more potent the older you get (why,yes; you may call me Captain Obvious). Two-yr-olds are starting the smelly process, but are also generally potty trained around that time and it's flushed down the toilet. My son has had years to perfect his "aromatic bouquet", and also perfect his bathroom-dodging techniques. It takes a full scrubdown with multiple wipes or a washcloth to get the caked-on poop off his butt after he's sat on it. I can say with absolute certainty that changing an older child's dirty underwear is a much different animal than changing a toddler's dirty underwear -- more mess, more smell.
BUT! Hopefully that is all behind us now!
Yay.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Fun with Preschoolers
My husband is really enjoying getting to be home with the kids right now. He missed most of A's early milestones, and missed a lot of K's too because of long work schedules or being away from home altogether. But now he gets to be a part of all of the guts-and-glory that is parenting.
For example, he got to watch our newly-4-yr-old daughter get her first "wedgie". We normally drive small cars, but we used a van on Thursday and she practically did a split climbing down out of it. K got a mortified expression on her face and her mouth hung open for a second before exclaiming, "My underwear! It's in my butt! Up in there!!!" We had to explain, while laughing, that she just needed to rearrange her foundation garments and she'd be OK. She had the most horrified expression on her little face, though.
Z also gets to "enjoy" K's constant chatter. I recognized the hunted expression on his face when I got home from work on Friday...I've sported that very same look myself on occasion. She also has a way with words. Today, I was explaining that she only needed one stool to sit on, not two or three. She asked why, so I explained that because she only has one bottom, she only needs one chair or stool to sit on at a time so we could share the others.
She looked at me very sweetly, and then proceeded to tell me that she had a little bottom, and A had a little bottom, but I had a "very big, large bottom" and so did her daddy -- and then started to describe how butts help us poop. Fabulous. While I'm glad she has an idea of how certain things work, this was not exactly the best conversation to be having in the church building. And, of course, this was all in front of our preacher. Of course it was. He didn't bat an eye, and I'm really hoping that his conversation he was already having with my husband at that moment somehow distracted the preacher or prevented him from hearing exactly what charming conversations I was having with my youngest.
K has also been taught that to "flex", or "make muscles", they have to be accompanied by sound effects. However, her father did not teach her the usual grunts associated with body building. I don't know why I would think he would; then again, this bit of knowledge(?) is not something I ever really thought about teaching to our daughter. Apparently, when raising your arms up on either side of you and making a large "U" shape, you have to meow like a cat. If you have one arm up and one arm down, like an Egyptian, then you have to squeak with the movements back and forth like a squeaky toy. And, if both arms are flexed downward, then you can grunt. I learn something new every day.
K is also convinced that I have insects in my cranium. I had a cold and told her that I had a bug. Later on, I mentioned that I was feeling "stinky" and rotten. K put two and two together, and now believes that when I'm congested that I have a "stinkbug in [my] head".
Adorable? Yes. Funny? Oh, yeah. Future blackmail material? You'd better believe it.
For example, he got to watch our newly-4-yr-old daughter get her first "wedgie". We normally drive small cars, but we used a van on Thursday and she practically did a split climbing down out of it. K got a mortified expression on her face and her mouth hung open for a second before exclaiming, "My underwear! It's in my butt! Up in there!!!" We had to explain, while laughing, that she just needed to rearrange her foundation garments and she'd be OK. She had the most horrified expression on her little face, though.
Z also gets to "enjoy" K's constant chatter. I recognized the hunted expression on his face when I got home from work on Friday...I've sported that very same look myself on occasion. She also has a way with words. Today, I was explaining that she only needed one stool to sit on, not two or three. She asked why, so I explained that because she only has one bottom, she only needs one chair or stool to sit on at a time so we could share the others.
She looked at me very sweetly, and then proceeded to tell me that she had a little bottom, and A had a little bottom, but I had a "very big, large bottom" and so did her daddy -- and then started to describe how butts help us poop. Fabulous. While I'm glad she has an idea of how certain things work, this was not exactly the best conversation to be having in the church building. And, of course, this was all in front of our preacher. Of course it was. He didn't bat an eye, and I'm really hoping that his conversation he was already having with my husband at that moment somehow distracted the preacher or prevented him from hearing exactly what charming conversations I was having with my youngest.
K has also been taught that to "flex", or "make muscles", they have to be accompanied by sound effects. However, her father did not teach her the usual grunts associated with body building. I don't know why I would think he would; then again, this bit of knowledge(?) is not something I ever really thought about teaching to our daughter. Apparently, when raising your arms up on either side of you and making a large "U" shape, you have to meow like a cat. If you have one arm up and one arm down, like an Egyptian, then you have to squeak with the movements back and forth like a squeaky toy. And, if both arms are flexed downward, then you can grunt. I learn something new every day.
K is also convinced that I have insects in my cranium. I had a cold and told her that I had a bug. Later on, I mentioned that I was feeling "stinky" and rotten. K put two and two together, and now believes that when I'm congested that I have a "stinkbug in [my] head".
Adorable? Yes. Funny? Oh, yeah. Future blackmail material? You'd better believe it.
Saturday, April 3, 2010
On the Brink
Things are looking up at the H house!
For starters, our son, A, has finally started completing his work at school. Much to the delight and surprise of his teacher, I might add. I'm not entirely sure she believed me when I told her he could read, spell, and write because A has flat-out refused to do most of his work this year.
In the last month or so, he has started filling out his writing sheets, doing his addition and subtraction, and been generally behaving himself in the classroom. Yay! This is a relief not only for his teacher, but also for me and Z. Knowing your son can do things, but having a stubborn child who refuses to do things for anyone but mom and dad is not a good combination when there are special needs in the mix. The teacher can only assess his abilities on her observations and experiences, not what A does when he's at home.
We're still having an issue with how they do the testing, as a good portion of it is verbal and our son is NOT overly verbal. He has made great strides, and can hold mini-conversations with Z and I, and a few other close friends, but on an over-all scale he is nowhere close to his peers. A's mini-conversations tend to be sentence fragments, rather than entire grammatically correct sentences, but we understand what he's trying to convey and are just glad he's making the effort. We can tell that it takes an enormous amount of concentration and energy to do what he is able to do, and as long as he's doing his best (and not being a lazy butt) we're fine with that.
Our son is, by the way, a lazy butt if he thinks he can get away with it -- he'll try to see if he can get out of doing whatever someone requests by ignoring them, or starting to stim while watching them out of the corner of his eye. If you're firm with him, and tell him to do whatever it is again, he'll stop stimming, sigh, and then actually do what he was asked to do. The key is knowing when A is trying to get out of doing something, and when he's genuinely stimming or off in his own world. The people that have figured the differences out, understandably, are the ones who spend the most time with him -- and since A is mainstreamed in a "normal" kindergarten classroom, his teacher's attention is divided between A and the other 17 kids in the class. As the year has progressed, she's figuring out A's cues.
In other news, our son has worn regular cotton undies for two days straight without any incident. We still have to prompt him, as he rarely volunteers to go to the bathroom on his own, but he has done a terrific job keeping his pants clean and dry. Of course, he also hasn't pooped in two days, so the streaking has not been an issue.
Our son, like a lot of autistic children, has some muscular weaknesses throughout his body. In addition to his fine-motor skills in his hands, he also lacks some core strength and bowel strength. In our research and conversations with other parents of autistic children, a lot of auties have issues with constipation and impaction. We have to make sure we feed A lots of foods that "make him go", such as sweet potatoes, spinach, and grapes, and try to avoid foods that stop you up, such as bananas, apples and apple juice, and cheese or yogurt. We also have to periodically give him an oral laxative and insert suppositories. If these don't work, then we have to do an old-fashioned enema.
The upside is, these things do what they're supposed to and things get moved on through. The downside is, if we don't do these things, he gets impacted and that means a trip to the hospital. AND another downside is, the more we have to resort to these measures, the less his bowels will do the work on their own; they become dependent on the laxatives and enemas.
"Poop" is a regular topic of conversation around here. Just keepin' it real, this is some of what we deal with on a daily basis.
On the non-crappy side of things, I started a new job this week! Fate had a conversation with irony and arranged this one for me: I was eligible for all sorts of state and federal assistance programs until I started my new job, and now I help people with their applications for those same programs. I have been blessed with the opportunity to help people who are -- literally -- where I just was, last week.
I know (some of) what they're going through, so I think I'm really going to enjoy parts of this job. Everyone has a unique story, and I know what a blessing and relief it is when your family is taken care of. The parts I won't enjoy are in there, too, as there are some clients who have some....interesting philosophies...regarding entitlement issues and how to improve one's financial position, and I am going to have to tell some people "no" and deal with the fall-out. Luckily for me, I am not making the final decision on the eligibility issues, so I don't have to sweat or fret about making the right or wrong decision, I just have to let them know what the decision is. It won't help me when I have to tell someone I would love to help "no", though.
I'm going to have to learn how to emotionally distance myself from our clients, or I'm going to have a lot of heartbreak and bad days. This is not to say I can't be compassionate or caring, those qualities must be shown to everyone to provide dignity and respect to the client. I just can't cry every time I have to turn someone away who is in desperate need. And I also can't get mad or too frustrated if I get a client who is obviously lying and trying to pull a fast one, like yesterday.
There will be a learning curve, but I'm glad to both have a job, and have a job where I can help people at a time when they need it most.
For starters, our son, A, has finally started completing his work at school. Much to the delight and surprise of his teacher, I might add. I'm not entirely sure she believed me when I told her he could read, spell, and write because A has flat-out refused to do most of his work this year.
In the last month or so, he has started filling out his writing sheets, doing his addition and subtraction, and been generally behaving himself in the classroom. Yay! This is a relief not only for his teacher, but also for me and Z. Knowing your son can do things, but having a stubborn child who refuses to do things for anyone but mom and dad is not a good combination when there are special needs in the mix. The teacher can only assess his abilities on her observations and experiences, not what A does when he's at home.
We're still having an issue with how they do the testing, as a good portion of it is verbal and our son is NOT overly verbal. He has made great strides, and can hold mini-conversations with Z and I, and a few other close friends, but on an over-all scale he is nowhere close to his peers. A's mini-conversations tend to be sentence fragments, rather than entire grammatically correct sentences, but we understand what he's trying to convey and are just glad he's making the effort. We can tell that it takes an enormous amount of concentration and energy to do what he is able to do, and as long as he's doing his best (and not being a lazy butt) we're fine with that.
Our son is, by the way, a lazy butt if he thinks he can get away with it -- he'll try to see if he can get out of doing whatever someone requests by ignoring them, or starting to stim while watching them out of the corner of his eye. If you're firm with him, and tell him to do whatever it is again, he'll stop stimming, sigh, and then actually do what he was asked to do. The key is knowing when A is trying to get out of doing something, and when he's genuinely stimming or off in his own world. The people that have figured the differences out, understandably, are the ones who spend the most time with him -- and since A is mainstreamed in a "normal" kindergarten classroom, his teacher's attention is divided between A and the other 17 kids in the class. As the year has progressed, she's figuring out A's cues.
In other news, our son has worn regular cotton undies for two days straight without any incident. We still have to prompt him, as he rarely volunteers to go to the bathroom on his own, but he has done a terrific job keeping his pants clean and dry. Of course, he also hasn't pooped in two days, so the streaking has not been an issue.
Our son, like a lot of autistic children, has some muscular weaknesses throughout his body. In addition to his fine-motor skills in his hands, he also lacks some core strength and bowel strength. In our research and conversations with other parents of autistic children, a lot of auties have issues with constipation and impaction. We have to make sure we feed A lots of foods that "make him go", such as sweet potatoes, spinach, and grapes, and try to avoid foods that stop you up, such as bananas, apples and apple juice, and cheese or yogurt. We also have to periodically give him an oral laxative and insert suppositories. If these don't work, then we have to do an old-fashioned enema.
The upside is, these things do what they're supposed to and things get moved on through. The downside is, if we don't do these things, he gets impacted and that means a trip to the hospital. AND another downside is, the more we have to resort to these measures, the less his bowels will do the work on their own; they become dependent on the laxatives and enemas.
"Poop" is a regular topic of conversation around here. Just keepin' it real, this is some of what we deal with on a daily basis.
On the non-crappy side of things, I started a new job this week! Fate had a conversation with irony and arranged this one for me: I was eligible for all sorts of state and federal assistance programs until I started my new job, and now I help people with their applications for those same programs. I have been blessed with the opportunity to help people who are -- literally -- where I just was, last week.
I know (some of) what they're going through, so I think I'm really going to enjoy parts of this job. Everyone has a unique story, and I know what a blessing and relief it is when your family is taken care of. The parts I won't enjoy are in there, too, as there are some clients who have some....interesting philosophies...regarding entitlement issues and how to improve one's financial position, and I am going to have to tell some people "no" and deal with the fall-out. Luckily for me, I am not making the final decision on the eligibility issues, so I don't have to sweat or fret about making the right or wrong decision, I just have to let them know what the decision is. It won't help me when I have to tell someone I would love to help "no", though.
I'm going to have to learn how to emotionally distance myself from our clients, or I'm going to have a lot of heartbreak and bad days. This is not to say I can't be compassionate or caring, those qualities must be shown to everyone to provide dignity and respect to the client. I just can't cry every time I have to turn someone away who is in desperate need. And I also can't get mad or too frustrated if I get a client who is obviously lying and trying to pull a fast one, like yesterday.
There will be a learning curve, but I'm glad to both have a job, and have a job where I can help people at a time when they need it most.
Cooking Venture -- Greek-Style Spinach Pie
Spinach is one of the first things we harvest in the spring-time here. It is very tolerant of cold weather, and when planted under cloches or in a cold-frame, you can get a very early harvest! It is so refreshing to have fresh greens after a long winter.
One of our favorite things to do with spinach in this house is to incorporate it into a variety of Greek and Mediterranean dishes. Our favorite, hands down, is spanikopita. The traditional version calls for many, many sheets of phyllo pastry and a lot of butter that's brushed between the pastry sheets. While it tastes fabulous (sometimes I swear I hear an angelic chorus when I take my first bite), it is loaded with a lot of fat. And the fat cells in my butt are the friendly sort, always welcoming to newcomers.
Soooo, after some experimentation, I have come up with a lower-fat version using pie crusts. Notice I did not say "fat-free", pie crust has enough lipid storage-inducing action of its own. But the fat content of the pie crust is still much, much lower than the traditional phyllo and butter combination. Without further ado, my perversion of Greek spinach pie:
Non-traditional Greek-style Spinach Pie
2 pounds fresh spinach -- washed, stemmed, and chopped
olive oil
1 medium onion -- finely chopped
1 bunch of green onions, or about 4 to 5 scallions -- finely chopped
1/4 cup fresh snipped dill
1/4 cup fresh chopped parsley
4 large eggs
8 oz feta cheese, crumbled
1/4 to 1/2 cup grated parmesan cheese (if you have kefalotiri cheese, use that)
1/4 tsp salt, to taste (optional, depends on how salty your feta is)
freshly ground black pepper -- just a few grinds
pinch of freshly ground nutmeg -- a little goes a long way
crusts for a covered 9-inch pie (two pieces of pastry, one on top and one on bottom)
Preheat oven to 375 deg F.
Heat a couple of tablespoons of olive oil in a large skillet, over medium heat. Add onion and green onion/scallions, cook until softened (about 6 minutes).
Add chopped spinach a little at a time, cooking until wilted and liquid is released. Once all the spinach has been added to the pan (and this takes a few minutes), turn up the heat to "high" and cook until the liquid is gone and the spinach is fairly dry. Stir often to prevent burning!! The liquid evaporation will take about 10 minutes or so.
Add the dill and parsley, mix well. Remove from heat and let cool slightly. Place spinach into colander and press to remove any excess liquid that might be in there.
In a large bowl, lightly beat the eggs. Add the cooled spinach mixture, the feta, parmesan cheese, salt, a few grinds of black pepper, and the pinch of nutmeg. Mix well, ensuring the egg is completely incorporated (otherwise you'll get weird veins of scrambled egg in the middle of your spinach pie...just speaking from experience here).
Lightly grease a glass/ceramic pie dish with cooking oil. Place one crust on the bottom of the dish, making sure it fits on the bottom and up the sides, and filling in any holes or gaps. Put spinach/egg/cheese mixture into crust, spreading to evenly fill. I tend to make mine a little higher in the center and lower around the sides, but that's just my preference. Top with the other pie crust, sealing around the edges. Cut a few vent slits on the top of the pie with a sharp knife.
Bake for 45 minutes or so, or until your crust is golden brown. Let stand 10 minutes before cutting and serving.
************************************
NOTES: If you don't grow your own spinach, you can buy 2 of the 16-oz bags of fresh spinach at the market, or 3 of the 10-oz bags will get you close enough. I've also used 3 10-oz boxes of the frozen chopped spinach and it turns out just fine. DO NOT USE CANNED SPINACH, I can tell you from experience that it just does not work out well.
Also, you really do want to drain the cooked spinach mixture in a colander. This is important, because if there is extra liquid it makes the finished dish soggy and limp, and the crust is slimy. This goes for making it the traditional way with the phyllo, too. Removing all that liquid makes the dish have more body and a pleasing texture. You don't have to let it cool before doing this step, I just don't like to burn my hands. Allowing it to cool slightly also prevents the hot spinach from immediately cooking the eggs in the next step.
I have found that it is generally cheaper to buy a solid 8-oz block of feta and crumble it myself, than to purchase it already crumbled.
You can use dried herbs in place of the fresh ones, just use way less since dried herbs are so much stronger in flavor.
You can make your own pie crusts, or buy a box of 2 at the market.
My kids scarf this recipe, even my anti-vegetable son. He loves it!
Enjoy!
One of our favorite things to do with spinach in this house is to incorporate it into a variety of Greek and Mediterranean dishes. Our favorite, hands down, is spanikopita. The traditional version calls for many, many sheets of phyllo pastry and a lot of butter that's brushed between the pastry sheets. While it tastes fabulous (sometimes I swear I hear an angelic chorus when I take my first bite), it is loaded with a lot of fat. And the fat cells in my butt are the friendly sort, always welcoming to newcomers.
Soooo, after some experimentation, I have come up with a lower-fat version using pie crusts. Notice I did not say "fat-free", pie crust has enough lipid storage-inducing action of its own. But the fat content of the pie crust is still much, much lower than the traditional phyllo and butter combination. Without further ado, my perversion of Greek spinach pie:
Non-traditional Greek-style Spinach Pie
2 pounds fresh spinach -- washed, stemmed, and chopped
olive oil
1 medium onion -- finely chopped
1 bunch of green onions, or about 4 to 5 scallions -- finely chopped
1/4 cup fresh snipped dill
1/4 cup fresh chopped parsley
4 large eggs
8 oz feta cheese, crumbled
1/4 to 1/2 cup grated parmesan cheese (if you have kefalotiri cheese, use that)
1/4 tsp salt, to taste (optional, depends on how salty your feta is)
freshly ground black pepper -- just a few grinds
pinch of freshly ground nutmeg -- a little goes a long way
crusts for a covered 9-inch pie (two pieces of pastry, one on top and one on bottom)
Preheat oven to 375 deg F.
Heat a couple of tablespoons of olive oil in a large skillet, over medium heat. Add onion and green onion/scallions, cook until softened (about 6 minutes).
Add chopped spinach a little at a time, cooking until wilted and liquid is released. Once all the spinach has been added to the pan (and this takes a few minutes), turn up the heat to "high" and cook until the liquid is gone and the spinach is fairly dry. Stir often to prevent burning!! The liquid evaporation will take about 10 minutes or so.
Add the dill and parsley, mix well. Remove from heat and let cool slightly. Place spinach into colander and press to remove any excess liquid that might be in there.
In a large bowl, lightly beat the eggs. Add the cooled spinach mixture, the feta, parmesan cheese, salt, a few grinds of black pepper, and the pinch of nutmeg. Mix well, ensuring the egg is completely incorporated (otherwise you'll get weird veins of scrambled egg in the middle of your spinach pie...just speaking from experience here).
Lightly grease a glass/ceramic pie dish with cooking oil. Place one crust on the bottom of the dish, making sure it fits on the bottom and up the sides, and filling in any holes or gaps. Put spinach/egg/cheese mixture into crust, spreading to evenly fill. I tend to make mine a little higher in the center and lower around the sides, but that's just my preference. Top with the other pie crust, sealing around the edges. Cut a few vent slits on the top of the pie with a sharp knife.
Bake for 45 minutes or so, or until your crust is golden brown. Let stand 10 minutes before cutting and serving.
************************************
NOTES: If you don't grow your own spinach, you can buy 2 of the 16-oz bags of fresh spinach at the market, or 3 of the 10-oz bags will get you close enough. I've also used 3 10-oz boxes of the frozen chopped spinach and it turns out just fine. DO NOT USE CANNED SPINACH, I can tell you from experience that it just does not work out well.
Also, you really do want to drain the cooked spinach mixture in a colander. This is important, because if there is extra liquid it makes the finished dish soggy and limp, and the crust is slimy. This goes for making it the traditional way with the phyllo, too. Removing all that liquid makes the dish have more body and a pleasing texture. You don't have to let it cool before doing this step, I just don't like to burn my hands. Allowing it to cool slightly also prevents the hot spinach from immediately cooking the eggs in the next step.
I have found that it is generally cheaper to buy a solid 8-oz block of feta and crumble it myself, than to purchase it already crumbled.
You can use dried herbs in place of the fresh ones, just use way less since dried herbs are so much stronger in flavor.
You can make your own pie crusts, or buy a box of 2 at the market.
My kids scarf this recipe, even my anti-vegetable son. He loves it!
Enjoy!
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