Fun with Preschoolers

My husband is really enjoying getting to be home with the kids right now. He missed most of A's early milestones, and missed a lot of K's too because of long work schedules or being away from home altogether. But now he gets to be a part of all of the guts-and-glory that is parenting.

For example, he got to watch our newly-4-yr-old daughter get her first "wedgie". We normally drive small cars, but we used a van on Thursday and she practically did a split climbing down out of it. K got a mortified expression on her face and her mouth hung open for a second before exclaiming, "My underwear! It's in my butt! Up in there!!!" We had to explain, while laughing, that she just needed to rearrange her foundation garments and she'd be OK. She had the most horrified expression on her little face, though.

Z also gets to "enjoy" K's constant chatter. I recognized the hunted expression on his face when I got home from work on Friday...I've sported that very same look myself on occasion. She also has a way with words. Today, I was explaining that she only needed one stool to sit on, not two or three. She asked why, so I explained that because she only has one bottom, she only needs one chair or stool to sit on at a time so we could share the others.

She looked at me very sweetly, and then proceeded to tell me that she had a little bottom, and A had a little bottom, but I had a "very big, large bottom" and so did her daddy -- and then started to describe how butts help us poop. Fabulous. While I'm glad she has an idea of how certain things work, this was not exactly the best conversation to be having in the church building. And, of course, this was all in front of our preacher. Of course it was. He didn't bat an eye, and I'm really hoping that his conversation he was already having with my husband at that moment somehow distracted the preacher or prevented him from hearing exactly what charming conversations I was having with my youngest.

K has also been taught that to "flex", or "make muscles", they have to be accompanied by sound effects. However, her father did not teach her the usual grunts associated with body building. I don't know why I would think he would; then again, this bit of knowledge(?) is not something I ever really thought about teaching to our daughter. Apparently, when raising your arms up on either side of you and making a large "U" shape, you have to meow like a cat. If you have one arm up and one arm down, like an Egyptian, then you have to squeak with the movements back and forth like a squeaky toy. And, if both arms are flexed downward, then you can grunt. I learn something new every day.

K is also convinced that I have insects in my cranium. I had a cold and told her that I had a bug. Later on, I mentioned that I was feeling "stinky" and rotten. K put two and two together, and now believes that when I'm congested that I have a "stinkbug in [my] head".

Adorable? Yes. Funny? Oh, yeah. Future blackmail material? You'd better believe it.