6 Hours

Things I've learned in the first six hours of today (plus directions on how to duplicate this experience for yourself!):

1) Cheerios fit nicely in the back of toy dump trucks. Be sure to mash a few while depositing them in the "dumper" area.

2) When your three-yr-old throws a toy dump truck full of Cheerios down the stairs, they fly pretty far.

3) Cheerios achieving high velocity hurt when they hit you. They also bounce amazingly well, and can get into every possible nook and cranny available. Be sure to sweep up immediately, giving your 3-yr-old time to climb up on the counter and grab the markers.

4) Dry erase markers wipe off most everything except laminate floors. The only thing that seems to work (and I've tried various methods, including a Magic Eraser) is the sole of the tan Army combat boots. It gets most of it off. Be sure your 3-yr-old can figure out how to get to the cleaning supplies while you are in the living room attacking the marker spots.

5) A brand new economy-sized bottle of Windex, when the top is removed, can cover a kitchen floor that is 10 x 10. I have a streak-free kitchen floor, though.

6) If your 11-month-old eats a red crayon while mommy mops up Windex, she will look like a vampire for the rest of the day, because the red dye doesn't want to wash off.

7) While you are doing dishes, let your 3-yr-old open the door to the laundry room for little sister. Have him show her the shiny cans of pop. An 11-month old is able to open a can of pop, even if a 30-yr old adult sometimes has problems doing the same.

8) Cans of Dr. Pepper that have been shaken and rolled before opened will spray soda all the way up to a 9-ft ceiling. Your babies will squeal with delight and clap their hands at the pretty fountain. Mop up immediately, to prevent stickiness, and make sure you can't see the back door or the dog.

9) When your dog is caught in the act of going to the bathroom on the floor, do not startle them by yelling "NOOOOOO!". A startled dog can shoot pee up to 10 feet.

10) Your baby, who learned to walk 2 weeks ago should not be able to climb stairs. But she apparently can, while mommy cleans up soda and dog pee, and then she can climb down backwards ~ deftly, and with speed as mommy simultaneously has a heart attack and her stomach drops into her toes. Brothers are good at removing barriers in front of the stairs. (We can't attach a gate because there's nothing to attach it to...the spindles are round and not spaced the same way on both sides, so no baby gate. Whoever built this didn't have kids, I think).

And now it's naptime for kiddies...we'll see what this afternoon brings....